I'm going to a college reunion of sorts this weekend. The reunion isn't for any particular class year, but rather for all of the alumni of the University of Scranton's Special Jesuit Liberal Arts (SJLA) program.
Reunions for me are always a time of internal conflict. Even just meeting with a few old friends several months ago brought on these feelings - inadequacy, disappointment with what I've done with my life, feelings that I've wasted my time and not lived up to my potential. I think some of my readers thought of this as a case of the "winter blues", coming as it did at the very end of December, but I believe it was actually a moment of clarity, a moment when all of my comfortable daily routines had been stripped away and I was forced to confront the reality of my situation.
This isn't necessarily a bad thing. This weekend may be the kick in the pants I need to do something with my life beyond grinding the daily grind and hoping that things will get better. As I recently heard on the radio from a soldier, a veteran of Iraq, "Hope is not a strategy." (He was quoting someone else.) And I can console myself with the knowledge that many of the other people at the reunion are experiencing their own feelings of disappointment with themselves, regardless of their levels of success.
Sounds like fun, huh? Actually, I'm sure it will be. I'll be seeing a lot of people I haven't seen in a very long time. I'll have to take copies of my blog card with me!
Waning gibbous, February 20, 2022, 3:45 AM
2 years ago
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