Where I'm at right now

I'm feeling pretty low.

It's the job thing, of course, and the frustration at trying to find another job, with the additional requirement that I find a good job in this area. That's a pretty tall order. Plus it's the realization that I am finally moving into the region where finances will start to be very difficult. But that won't last too long. After that, they become unworkable.

I guess the major problem for me is the feeling that everything I've done up to this point is meaningless. B.S. in Physics? Thanks, call us back when you have a Master's. Nearly seventeen years of experience in manufacturing? That's great, if you want to go work in a factory. I think there might be an opening on the loading dock.

Ah, I know Statistical Process Control? Can you pull control chart constants out of your ass? No, that's what the books are for. Plus, it's been nearly ten years since SPC was a part of my real job description, so people see that as a pretty stale skill.

(Technically, my job description for over ten years at my previous job was "Statistician", according to Human Resources. Even though that had nothing to do with what I've been doing since 1999, even though I tried to explain this to them years ago, that's what their records said so that's how it must be.)

So I spent the past eight years as a DVD Asset Manager? So what the hell is that? Try to explain this to someone and either their eyes will immediately glaze over if they don't understand at all, or they'll quickly decide that whatever it was isn't relevant to what they're looking for. And the one other company in the area that knows what a DVD Asset Manager is, aside from the one that decided they no longer need one, isn't hiring. Or isn't hiring me, at least.

So I'm a blogger? So what the hell does that mean?

It will pass. I'm feeling sorry for myself, maybe justifiably so. No-response job applications and no-response letters of inquiry and no-response interviews and a big loud hyperenthusiastic presentation for what may very well be a multi-level marketing scam, a "sorry, can't help you" from a highly recommended headhunter, a sense of impending financial doom - all are real, legitimate reasons to be discouraged.

But I'll soldier on. Hell, I'm half-Polish. That's what we do. I'll keep on scouring the websites and the classified ads, keep looking for that perfect job that everyone has been assuring me for over four months is waiting just around the corner. I'll dip into my emergence reserves, and my emergency reserve reserves, and the ones after that until there are no more. I'll do what I have to to survive.

Damn. This sucks.