Saturday, December 24, 2005

Merry Christmas 2005 from Another Monkey!

My card design for 2005: Three-O-Nina, at the forefront of the culture wars!

I was looking to see if the owners had dressed up Three-O-Nina at all for Christmas. For a twelve-foot-tall cow she's actually quite easy to overlook, and I had to focus my attention to actually see her as I drove by. But when I did, I nearly crashed my car laughing, and knew I would have to be back in the daylight hours with a camera.

For those unaware of the internal religio-politico environment in the United States, there is an increasingly militant debate going on between religious extremists on the one hand who feel that Christmas is the sole property of Christianity and any attempt to secularize it or recognize heathen festivals like that newfangled Hanukkah thing is a direct affront to the One True Religion, and secular extremists on the other hand who are striving to create an air of inclusion by excluding any recognition of religious connotations to the holiday. Most Americans, of course, have compromised by treating the days following Thanksgiving and the entire month of December as an orgy of consumerism called "Christmas" while also respecting the religious aspect of the holiday (for Christians, anyway) by making it one of the two days out of the entire year they actually go to Church. (The other is Easter. We call these "Lily and Poinsettia Christians.")

I find the entire debate preposterous, but soon I think the religious extremists will begin to employ the same tactics to this debate that they freely utilize in the abortion debate (namely arson, bombings, death threats, and assassinations.) Those wacky religious extremists, always ready to kill in the name of the Prince of Peace.

But in the meantime I find this image itself preposterous. Someone saw fit to use a twelve-foot-tall cow to remind us to "KEEP CHRIST IN CHRISTMAS." Somehow the Gospel writers skipped over the bit about the GIANT FREAKIN' COW that was hanging out by the manger. And I shudder to think what would have happened if that cow had felt a bit peckish and decided to snack on the hay in the manger, and failed to notice the little baby dressed in swaddling clothes laying there...

Merry Christmas, everybody!

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas, indeed! Harold, don't you mean Happy Holidays? Think like the neo-cons and stab the thorn in the side and twist at all opportunities. You missed that one. Good thing I stumbled along to set you straight.

Also, I've wondered about your blog name - Another Monkey. Does that refer to the fact that 99 more monkeys joining in and typing would eventually crank out a novel? Just wondering. A Slammin' Solstice to you, pal.


cooper

D.B. Echo said...

Welcome, Cooper! I'm glad to see that my desperate plea for attent- I mean, my comment on Adam's site brought over some readers!

Actually, I'm using the neocon technique of co-opting the argument. I won't give them the satisfaction of dancing to the tune they call. I'm a Liberal, and I say "Merry Christmas." Just wait until I use their technique of turning the argument against the presenter, and accuse them of commercializing and trivializing Christmas. (Not really much need for an argument there, is there?)

I was just picking up fish for our Vigil Supper (a tradition in my Polish Roman Catholic family) and the bartender/owner of the restaurant where I was getting it told me that he had hosted a wedding for some Jehovah's Witnesses last night. He asked one of the D.J.'s if he was ready for Christmas - and nearly got decked! Apparently Jehovah's Witnesses don't take too kindly to being wished a "Merry Christmas."

As for "Another Monkey", it's all explained in my introductory entry:
http://anothermonkey.blogspot.com/2004/05/another-monkey-with-blog.html

Anonymous said...

Harold, howdy. Just wandered over to see about a giant cow, not bad. I'm a big one for the wonderfully incongruent and absurd. Cows are just an added bonus. Hang in there guy.

D.B. Echo said...

Murray! Yayyy, another fellow Felbernaut! I'm hoping Felberpalooza 2006 actually comes to pass - I think it's only a four-hour drive from here to Grouseland. And if you ever find yourself up in the mountainous, mine-riddled splendor of the northeast corner of our fair Commomwealth, let me know! Or at the very leat, go pay homage to the giant cow!

Anonymous said...

Hey, Harold, I love the creche with the giant cow!

D.B. Echo said...

Welcome, Hedera! I did some quick research on the giant cow in Wilkes-Barre and found that it's apparently one in a series of giant cows made by the F.A.S.T. Corporation! I'm thinking about doing a link-filled entry in a few weeks!

Anonymous said...

G'day Harold. Happy Solstice!

Maybe the cow comes from a "Keep the ham in hamburger" campaign? Oh, wait, that'd be a pig, wouldn't it... "Keep the pig in the whitehouse"??

Keep typing, dude. Some of us are listening!
Pete (in Van Diemen's Land)

D.B. Echo said...

Howdy, Pete! Thanks for stopping by! I have a soft spot in my heart for Aussies and Aussie bloggers - Sammie from sdfsdf.wox.org (located in New South Wales) has one of the first blogs I ever read regularly, and still do!

roadsidewonders said...

Best. Christmas. Card. Ever.