A new record at the Sideshow Gathering 2009!

On November 7th, 2009, twenty people - both professional sideshow performers and amateurs from the audience - gathered onstage to set a record for the largest number of people to simultaneously perform the "human blockhead" trick developed by Melvin Burkhart. From the record citation:

Block Head: most people to simultaneously perform: 20. Tyler Fyre, organizer. Included: Tyler Fyre, Colonel Hunsley, Prof. Fountain, Prof. John Sprocket, Gwyd The Unusual, Swami Yomahi, Crispy Knight, James Taylor, Harley Newman, Doc. Wilson, Casey Severen, John Shaw, Donny Boroneo, Wanda Von Dunajew, Michael Katner, James Mundie, Martin Ling, Jim Stilianos, Mace, and Johnny Mahem.*

Implements involved included nails, screwdrivers, ice picks, a switchblade, a fork, a spoon, the earpiece from a pair of glasses, and a pair of scissors.


Picture by Timothy Cridland, a.k.a. Zamora, the Torture King


*Note: There are several typos and inaccuracies in this list. A corrected list is being developed.

We interrupt this blog...

After five glorious days off, three of which were spent at the Sideshow Gathering, I am heading back to work for four nights. Unfortunately, work days are so draining, and the Sideshow Gathering posts take so long to write, that I probably won't be able to do my Day 3 post until Sunday at the earliest.

Today is also Veteran's Day. I don't have anything clever or insightful to say about that, other than this: I wish we weren't so darned good at filling up our hospitals and cemeteries with veterans. Remember all those who have served, in whatever capacity.

Scenes from the Sideshow Gathering, Day 1

Note: My reports on the Sideshow Gathering began with the end of Day 3, and then covered all of Day 2. Now we move on to Day 1, at least as much of it as I was there for...

I missed the very start of the Sideshow Gathering. I don't even remember why; it just happened. Most of the acts I missed came back onstage later in the weekend, but I missed Professor Fountain's routine entirely. Next year for sure!


When I came in, Gwyd the Unusual and Sylver Fyre of the Knotty Bits Sideshow were onstage, and had just called for a volunteer from the audience to assist in a balloon-popping routine. Here, Sylver (as far as the blindfolded volunteer knows) is about to use a whip to pop the big blue balloon between her hapless victim's legs.


Sylver and Gwyd then prepared to move on to a fire act - but, since fire was forbidden within the building, they had to go to a backup - snake charming. Here Gwyd reads from the mail-order snake charming instruction manual while Sylver presents a cute, cuddly Boa Constrictor that is deemed insufficiently menacing for the routine.


So Sylver moved on to the next option - a huge Albino Burmese Python. Here she strikes a "sexy pose" while attempting to heft the charmed snake.


Next up was Professor Sprocket, who treated the crowd to a glimpse of P.T. Barnum's original Mermaid, and then regaled them with patter that gradually became more and more incoherent. A true man of science, the Professor quickly determined that he had a screw loose, and attempted to correct it via a screwdriver inserted nasally. It took a few tries, but he eventually got the setting just right. More or less.


Master of Ceremonies Tyler Fyre (no relation to Sylver) then took the stage to fill everyone in on the magnificence of the weekend ahead.


Soon he yielded the stage to the Crispy Family Carnival, whose current family members include the lovely Roxanne, the strongman Mace, and of course, the father and leader of the Family, Crispy Knight himself. Crispy recalled past adventures making the cross-country excursion from the wilds of Oklahoma to the mountainous woodlands of Pennsylvania. One disastrous experience with the Crispy Bus several years ago has led them to see the wisdom of travelling by Toyota subcompact. But how do they all fit into such a small vehicle? Simple: Space Saver bags. Here they demonstrate by placing the lovely Roxanne into one and vacuuming out all the air.


Tyler Fyre returned to the stage, but this time as half of the Lucky Daredevil Thrillshow. Here the lovely Thrill Kill Jill demonstrates the miracle of "birth in reverse". Walt Hudson, sitting front and center, is about to get splashed with amniotic fluid.


The Swami Yomahmi was up next and demonstrated a dramatically orchestrated "pins into thumb" routine. Real magicians never reveal their secrets, but as the Swami reminded the crowd, he isn't a real magician. Unfortunately, something went seriously wrong during the explanation. Here the Swami realizes he has missed a critical step.


Next was Dr. Wilson, who demonstrated Chung Ling Soo's "Defying the Boxers" routine, modified for use in venues where gunfire is frowned upon. Here he is about to get shot in the face - with a paintball.*


Then came Coney Island Chris, who amused the audience with his ineptitude, propensity for self-injury, and marked fondness for pretzel rods. Having demonstrated by use of pretzel rods the power of the leg hold trap that is really old and rusty, and totally not a new one painted black and yellow as Todd Robbins recommends, he then proceeded to get his right hand inextricably caught in it. He then demonstrated that it's really, really hard to perform the rest of his routine with one hand caught in a leg hold trap.


John Shaw was the only performer onstage for the entire weekend - or, at least, just off-stage. In addition to being the sound man for the entire Gathering, he is also a professional magician and the operator of the Headless Horseman Hayride in Ulster Park, New York. Here he performs a routine involving a can connected with chains to hooks inserted into his eye sockets - and a volunteer from the audience who is very close to throwing up as he directs her to pour water into the can. (I think John was a little disappointed that he didn't make her throw up onstage!)


In a change of pace, Chris McDaniel performed a one-man Wild West Show, wowing the crowd with gun-spinning, whip-cracking, and rope twirling.


Here he twirls a lasso over the heads of the audience while singing "Give a Man Enough Rope" from The Will Rogers Follies. Chris ended his performance to thundering applause and a standing ovation.

The last act of the night was the living legend Zamora, the Torture King. After a light snack - well, a lightbulb snack - he then thanked the audience for its fine appetite for liquor before smashing up a tub full of empty liquor bottles and walking and laying in them. Two volunteers from the audience assisted him in the next part of the act: one by standing on his chest, the other by stabilizing her. It took some trying, but eventually Zamora got her to understand that when he shouted "Jump!" he didn't want her to jump off of his chest, but rather up and down on it.

Finally came Zamora's signature piece: skewers through the forearm, bicep, and floor of his mouth.

And that was only Day 1!


For Day 2's festivities, go here.


*To see a full video of Dr. Wilson performing the routine at the 2009 Chung Ling Soo Stage Magic Competition on May 17, 2009, at the Alamo Theatre in Bucksport, Maine, go here.

Scenes from the Sideshow Gathering, Day 2

Thanks to the marvels of modern technology, I took nearly six hundred photos at this year's Sideshow Gathering. Many of these were rapid-fire "sports mode" sequences intended to capture fast action in situations where things were moving so quickly I couldn't count on getting a decent shot by conventional means. In all maybe one hundred of the photos are halfway decent, and I'll publish the best few here. (I may dump more of them to Facebook.)

So much happened in the three days of the Gathering that it would be exhausting to try to get it all down. But I'll take a shot at it....

First I must mention the crowd. I believe there were sixty chairs (give or take a few) arranged in three rows. More chairs were constantly being commandeered from various parts of the room, and still for the most part this was a standing-room-only event!

I ran into several people I knew from work. Based on their extensive body art I assumed they were there for the Tattoo Convention part of the show - but no, they were there for the Sideshow Gathering! One of them videotaped much of Day 1. Perhaps I can convince him to post it to YouTube!

I'm doing this a bit out of order. I've already written up much of what I have to say about Day 1 of the Gathering, but apparently I've never posted it to Blogger! I've spent so much time on Day 2, I'll have to cover Day 1 some other time!

Day 2 started off with a bang - or at least a clank, a whine, and a shower of sparks, as the lovely Roxanne of the Crispy Family Carnival took the stage clad in a plate mail bikini and carrying an angle grinder. She proceeded to do a sort of bump-and-grind striptease, as she bumped the grinder wheel up against the various pieces of metal plating protecting her modesty, which dropped away one clanking piece at a time. For those who might suspect this was all a trick, Roxanne demonstrated the real danger of this routine by briefly (and accidentally) touching her back just above her kidneys (you really, really don't want to get injured there) and leaving a brushburn that required medical attention, most likely delivered by one of the many men of science and/or arcane learning lurking in the wings.

More skin was next on the menu, and it was provided in generous portions by the Crispy Family Carnival's resident strongman, Mace, who performed a traditional Dance of the Chippendales.

The merciless leader of the Family, Crispy Knight, then ordered Mace to earn the Family's gas money back to Oklahoma. Fiendish sideshow fans lined up for the opportunity to staple filthy, MRSA-laden currency to Mace's delicate flesh. (Crispy did this routine himself last year, but apparently his doctor has ordered him to cut back on staples.) One customer only had a five dollar bill, and asked Mace if he could make change.

The Swami Yomahmi took the stage for some delightfully educational entertainment. Here, in a bit he freely attributes to Todd Robbins, he demonstrates how balloon animals are made.

Next up was the always charming and delightful Dr. Wilson, winner of this year's Candlelight Award (which honors young performers that are keeping the circus and sideshow dreams alive in the present day) to pitch his Memory Elixir ("a wholesome blend of natural extracts of thirty different herbs and root vegetables that promotes and revitalizes the capacity for learning and memory, strengthens the nerves, and effectively wards off cataleptic neuroplexy.") I purchased a bottle and consumed it before beginning this post, to help renew the memories of the Gathering!

The Guest of Honor for this year's Gathering was Dick Johnson, who regaled the attendees of that night's Sideshow Auction with background stories on many of the objects up for auction and the people who once wore or used them. Here he "leather lungs it", addressing the gathered crowd without the aid of a microphone, before going into a series of magic tricks expertly performed with the simplest of props - and a borrowed pair of scissors.

I have read about Harley Newman, but didn't recognize him until he pulled out his four-spike bed of nails. After just a few moments of conversation in the parking lot on Day 3, I came to the conclusion that he is one of the nicest people I have ever met anywhere!

John Shaw is a magician who also ran the Headless Horseman Hayride in Ulster Park, New York for the Halloween season. He alone was onstage (or just off-stage) for every act each of the three days, since he was also tasked with being the sound man for every act, and doing on-the-fly microphone and radio transmitter/receiver repairs as needed. John did a Day 2 performance which was, remarkably, almost note-for-note and beat-for-beat identical to his performance on Day 1 - the only major difference being the volunteers he recruited from the audience. His Day 2 eye torture assistant was less squeamish than the one he had on Day 1, so there was less chance that she might vomit all over the stage (which, as John pointed out, would have been the coolest. thing. ever.)

Day 2 Part 1 ended with something very special - a Mass Blockhead Event. The "Blockhead", in which a foreign object like, say, a nail is inserted into the nose so it appears to be penetrating the skull, is one of the first tricks any sideshow performer learns, and is so simple that it could be taught to members of the audience in a few minutes. Several members of the audience joined the professionals onstage for a simultaneous insertion of nails, screwdrivers, icepicks, spoons, forks, the earpiece to a pair of glasses, a switchblade, a pair of scissors - twenty objects inserted into twenty noses all at the same time. Live on stage!

There then followed a brief intermission.

...at the end of which, the Amazing Blazing Tyler Fyre and Thrill Kill Jill as the Lucky Daredevil Thrillshow took the stage! Showing that he is so much more than a slick-talking Master of Ceremonies, here Tyler Fyre demonstrates the single most dangerous act in the Sideshow: sword swallowing! No trick here, no roll-up fake blade or a blade that collapses into the handle - just cold steel down the throat and into the stomach.

Then on to another classic act involving deadly edged weapons: knife throwing! Here Tyler rains cold steel all around Jill's lovely body...

...and Jill returns the favor. Note the position of the knife in the shield/target Tyler is holding. Had it continued along its trajectory, Tyler might have been doing future pitches in a much higher voice!

The next part of the act: snake charming! Or snake handling. Big snakes. Big, beautiful, snakes. Two of them!

A little late for Halloween, but Tyler decided to carve a pumpkin. With a chainsaw. On Jill's stomach. Once again, Walt Hudson is right in the splatter zone, getting sprayed with pumpkin innards - and worse, if Tyler somehow screws this up!

As a finale, Tyler smashes a cinder block with a sledgehammer - again, on Jill's stomach! And this time, Walt has to dodge flying bits of cinder block! Sometimes, the best seat in the house isn't such a good deal!

And that was the end of the Sideshow Acts for Day 2. But the night wasn't officially over yet - there was still the Sideshow Auction to go. Many remarkable and historic items went up for auction, some snatched up by collectors, others claimed by sideshow performers themselves, many of whom had donated other items to the auction. Some items went for a song, and in some cases the bidding was furiously intense. The high bid of the night was for an object donated by a living legend who was present in the room - a whiskey decanter filled with piercing needles used by Zamora the Torture King!

Sideshow Gathering 2009: The Final Bow

There's so much to say about the 2009 Sideshow Gathering that I don't know where to begin. So I will begin at the end, when Master of Ceremonies Tyler Fyre called all performers still present up to the stage for a final bow, a final round of applause.

At some point I will list the names of all of these amazingly talented acts and performers, but I will leave you with this for now.

Carl Sagan Day

Today is the second day of the 2009 Sideshow Gathering. But it's also the first annual Carl Sagan Day.

http://www.carlsaganday.com/

This November 7, 2009, we will celebrate the life and contributions of the great astronomer, author, and philosopher, Carl Sagan, on the 75th anniversary of his birth.

Carl Sagan was a Professor of Astronomy and Space Science and Director of the Laboratory for Planetary Studies at Cornell University. He served as an advisor and consultant to NASA, and played a major role in the establishment of SETI (Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence). He was a Pulitzer Prize winning author and most familiar to the public through his COSMOS series on PBS. In addition to numerous awards, recognitions and honorary degrees for his outstanding contributions, he is acknowledged as one of the most effective public faces of astronomy and space science throughout the world. Sagan died in December 1996.

It hasn't been that long since this made the rounds the first time, but it's worth watching again and again. A Glorious Dawn: Carl Sagan featuring Stephen Hawking, by melodysheep.


The sky calls to us
if we do not destroy ourselves
we will, one day, venture to the stars

Keep the dream and the good works alive.


See also: Another Monkey: Carl Sagan

Off to the Gathering

There's been a small change in plans. I won't be hosting some friends who were coming up for the Sideshow Gathering - or, more specifically, won't be supplying a parking space for their trailer, which is still undergoing repairs. It's too bad - I was really looking forward to seeing them, but reality has to be dealt with. Oh, well.

In any event, I'll be heading to the show shortly. Hope to see you there!

NaBloPoMo

November is National Blog Posting Month. For those who choose to participate, as explained at the official site, the rules are simple: post to your blog every day in the month of November.

With only a handful of misses - and one abstinence - I have been posting to Another Monkey at least once a day for...well, a very long time. But, ironically, November is the month when I'm most likely to miss a post or two for a variety of reasons, including the Sideshow Gathering this weekend. Also, I'm something of a chronic non-joiner, so there's that, too.

So once again this year I'm not participating in National Blog Posting Month. But other people are. You can see some of their posts at the official NaBloPoMo site. If you're participating, let me know! Maybe the blogosphere isn't as critically endangered as I've been thinking it is...

Just when you thought it was safe to start using Firefox again...

I haven't used Firefox in over two years. I got tired of the crashes and failures, the uninstalls and reinstalls, all apparently related to a file called js3250.dll.

I don't miss it that much. Microsoft learned a lot from its upstart competitor and emulated some of its major features, like tabbed browsing. Through Google Reader and "following" on Blogger I've been able to get the same results as Firefox's "live bookmarks."

Still, every once in a while I will come across a site that sings the praises of Firefox, and tells you that it has been optimized for Firefox. And I wonder what I am missing.

My posts about the js3250.dll bug have been some of my most consistent hit generators since I first put them up. But lately - say, in the last few months - the number of hits from people searching specifically for js3250.dll has died off. Has the problem gone away?

Apparently not. Almost all of the increase in traffic in the last week of October can be traced to a single link on the Tech Support Guy forums - a link that was first posted on April 14, 2007.

So what's going on here? I wish I knew. Did Firefox make this problem go away for a while, only to have it come back with a vengeance? Who can say?

All I know for sure is, I won't be reinstalling Firefox anytime soon.

Sideshow Gathering this weekend!

From November 6th through the 8th, Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania will be graced with a remarkable and unique event: the Sideshow Gathering! Part convention, part performance, all fun! Sideshow performers from across the country and around the world will gather to meet, mingle, and put on a show for each other and for fans of this classic art form!

From the Sideshow Gathering Facebook page:

Step right up! Once again, Wilkes-Barre becomes the world's center of weirdness when the 16th Annual Inkin' The Valley tattoo convention and Sideshow Gathering 2009 rolls into town. From November 6th through 8th, the strange and unusual take center stage when showmen and genuine sideshow freaks from across the country descend on northeastern Pennsylvania to celebrate and display the giddy thrills and tantalizing mysteries of the circus and carnival sideshow. Over the weekend, these carnies will swap lies, swallow swords, eat razor blades, walk on broken glass, and otherwise risk bodily harm for the sake of entertainment.

Attractions at Sideshow Gathering 2009 will include: The Lucky Daredevil Thrillshow; Zamora, the Torture King; John Shaw; Dr. Wilson's Memory Elixir; The Crispy Family Carnival; Knotty Bits Sideshow; The Magic of Steve Hyde and Melanie; special guest emcee Tyler Fyre, and more! Vendors will also be on hand to display unusual items such as circus, carnival and freakshow memorabilia, rare books, and original artwork.

UPDATED!

Special Guest Emcee Tyler Fyre

Appearing:

The Lucky Daredevil Thrillshow
Zamora The Torture King
Doc Wilson
The Crispy Family
John Shaw
The Knotty Bits Sideshow
The Magic of Steve Hyde and Melanie
Pat Ward
Coney Island Chris
Professor Fountain
Swami Yohmahmi
Professor Sprocket
Col. Hunsley’s Freaks and Oddities
Shocked and Amazed
Cinda The Sign Queen
Odd Bob Blackmar
Rob Houston
Banners by Toni-Lee Sangastiano

Guest of Honor: Dick Johnson

SideShow Auction: 11pm Saturday

Concurrent with the 16th Annual Inkin' the Valley tattoo convention at Wilkes-Barre's The Woodlands Inn & Resort, Sideshow Gathering 2009 begins at 3:00 P.M. on Friday, November 6th, with live sideshow performances starting at 5:00 P.M. and continuing until midnight. Performances will resume from 3:00 to 6:00 P.M. and 10:00 P.M. to midnight on Saturday, followed by a special auction of rare and unusual circus, carnival and sideshow items at 11:00. On Sunday, there will be encore performances from 2:00 to 5:00 P.M. All of this will accompanied by the gentle hum of tattoo machines, as many talented artists quietly ply their trade. So, come one, come all to Wilkes-Barre for a weekend of entertainment and diversion you won't soon forget!

For more information -- including a list of the tattoo artists and piercers who will be in attendance -- please visit http://www.thesideshowgathering.com/ .

Check out the article that appeared in The Weekender!