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Thursday, August 17, 2006

Rough days ahead

I have an odd sort of memory. Most of my mind is pretty odd, wired completely differently from almost everyone else I have ever met. But one of the odd features of my mind is what I've always called the "Yesteryear" effect: I can remember, with great vividness, things that I experienced exactly a year ago.

It only happens once. That is, I don't re-experience things I was re-experiencing last year, at least not most of the time. Usually it's just once and done.

My father had a fall on the Friday of this week one year ago. That fall led to his death the following Wednesday.

My mom is finally packing up his old clothes and taking them to a place near Baltimore where they will be given away for free to the needy - far enough away that she won't be running into some homeless guy wearing one of my father's old suits from when he worked at the gas company 40 years ago. These will be some of the best-dressed bums around.

So. Things will be a little rough for the next few days. After the anniversary, there are some things I need to take care of, things I've needed to take care of for the past year. Please bear with me if I seem a little distracted, or odder than usual.

2 comments:

Super G said...

Hang in there. I think the first year after a loss is the worst and that greiving is more like a good two-year cycle. I know that I have various intense memories about the loss of our daughter and my brother's suicide that can be triggered by an anniversary or other things. That's probably pretty normal.

Best. Time can heal - but not erase - lots of stuff.

Betz said...

Keep writing down your thought and your feelings. I know that all of your blogger freinds will help you thru it here.
As for if you need to talk face to face, and want to speak of it with me. My studio is just a popcorn bag away from your office.
According to Bill the Bassman all the movies I am slated to watch this week have lots of boobies in them, maybe that will help to cheer you up since I'll be working on them this week......
You know how you have a habit of walking into my studio whenever a "pair" is on the screen?

You know where I am if you need to talk dear friend.